When traveling through Asia gets tiring, you can always get a good laugh by opening a menu and feasting your eyes upon the poorly-translated offerings. China has provided its share of chuckles. And then, one fateful night in Shanghai, we walked into a sketchy restaurant just off the Bund.

With a table full of boisterous, smoking diners next to us, we came upon the most deliciously-phrased menu items ever. Sink your teeth into these (click to see the larger images).

That’s right:¬†Phoenix Goose Anti Majorline-Domination Dry Pot Monsters! (What do you start with to get that result from Google Translate?)

Because of her¬†Bund, Karen didn’t join us in the Bund. Back at the hotel, when I told her about the PGAM-DDPM, she immediately asked, “What did it taste like?” Truth be told, it didn’t occur to me to order it. With just a couple weeks left before our summer break, I’ve been more concerned with choosing edible foods than hilarious foods. It would be nice to go home with a happy stomach.

Next time I see Phoenix Goose Anti Majorline-Domination Dry Pot Monsters on a menu, I will order it. As long as I have a Tsingtao handy to wash it down.